Friday, April 25, 2003

What Day is It Anyway???

Yeah, an update was dearly in need. yeah and i have been wanting to blog everso much lately as well...so much stuff, good and bad, has been going on, i'm just not finding the time, or too wrapped up in those things where i can't blog about them. well added to my crazy work-a-holic schedule i'm taking realty class from McColly in merrillville, 3 days a week, 3 hours a day; we should be finished towards the end of May or so. After that's done and over with i wil be a licensed realtor working for nancy frigo. It's insane, then i'll try to maintain 3 jobs for as long as i can, but something's bound to give eventually. Vince has helped in the career path of mine, getting his dad involved to get me into the car business, well we'll see how that panned out in awhile. In the mean time i've just been packing my stuff, trying to get it all into storage; you see my mom is leaving, says she'll be out by Friday, who knows, but then Larry will have the house entirely, apparently though i still have to get my shit out...and we all know how much shit i have. Yeah, the storage unit i was going to rent i looked over and came to the conclusion that it's just way to small, however my mom says everything should fit into a 5x10, highly unlikely i say, so now i need to upgrade to the only thing available, the 10x10, and hell, if there's enough room in there i may have to sleep in there sometimes, ok maybe not i don't think people would let me do that, though it is open 24 hours and i would be protecting my stuff...anyways...besides all that i have been in a lot of pain lately, got a swelling on my big toe believed to be an in-grown toe nail, it was actually pussing the other day, headache that hasn't gone away for the past 2 weeks which has caused ear aches in now both ears alternating at times, and my jaw/teeth will hurt as well. oh and the headache causes fits of fatigueness and that's defiantly not good for me, being tired when i have to be awake 24+ hours at times.....some will say it is lack of sleep, well i'll let you know this didn't happen until after the time i got some god sleep in me, i actually had some time off and such, and i got to sleep in straight intervals without interruption for an entire weekend or so, so beats the shit of out of me. But once agian i must appologize for not blogging, i never got to tell you about prom and all the other weekends with my lovely brooke, i feel as if i have neglected you and her...there was one time a few weeks ago i had thought about just posting comments, well a question or something, that would be it, just a thought in my head and hope people responded to give an answer, just a query such as, "if someone told you something that could allow you to better yourself with, then they told you that wasn't so, how would you react", well i don't think that was the actual wording, and the question has always caused confussion, and now that the whole question is messed up i'll never know the answer...but check in the future to my blog, and if you see a headline bolded rather than a ..... that means that is the entire posting, just that phrase, then feel free to go ahead and comment on it..though i don't know how much updating i will be able to in the next months......i should have a blogging title, "let the hop begin" but somebody has already taken that, and to think the one who has housed the homeless is now homeless himself...i'm almost eating my words i said to my mother 2 months ago, went a little something like this..."ma, don't worry about me, do what you want to do, if you want to move to misourri at any time, don't let me be the hindering factor" damn me and my .....well now, loss of words. well at the time the comments were in good faith, and i suppose they still are, her paranoia should decrease now that she is hundreds of miles away from larry...but to think, this move will be the crippiling factor in the dishoning of myself from the family; this once broken family will now completly seperate having no common ground to hold onto. granted my grandparents will be 22 minutes away in lynwood where my plates are registered, i suppose the only good things they are good for right about now. in no way have they tried to help me in my situation, offered help, money, housing, whatever, they try to have casual conversation with me, "how's it going, how's work, going to work now,...." anwyas enough with that, i've been noticing my typing really horrible tonight, probably due to the fact my hands are freezing. I wanted to do this update to let everyone know what was going on and for brooke. even though we talk everyday i guess she still feels the need to discipline me on my non-bloggingness, well as you can see she's keeping me inline, thanks. on the subject of brooke, i think she's great..she's beautiful, smart, funny, well i can go on all day, but i'm mostly happy to hear the words "i love you" come from her lips once agian. yes she loves me agian, well not agian, she's always loved me, but she's openly saying it to me. i'm just so happy. i'm not even sure what happened, it's not like i wooed back her love, or did something crazily romantic, whatever happened i'm glad it did. Nothing fills me up inside with so much joy and complete happiness as to hear those words come from her. In this rough time i know i can make it through with her by my side, you know the old saying, behind every great man there's a greater woman, or something like that, well you get my idea right. Yeah, she's my best friend, a really good friend to have, and i'm not going to go into the subject of where we stand either, that will just cause too much confusion, so discuss it amoungst yourselves, as far as i know we're just being friends, if anything comes of it, it will occur naturally like it has in the past and will blossom into something greater, until then don't ask, ...but i always could be wrong.... As you can see, the "H" key agian is causing me problems tonight. seems like i've been blogging for awhile, or the pain on the left side of my face is getting greater, in either case i think it is time to hang the keyboard up and call it a night, if i forgot anything in the process i'm sorry

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