Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Weird Feelings..
not going anywhere...

just one of those days you wished the earth would swallow you whole...

so only getting an hours worth of sleep, I didn't quite wake up on time for my appointment..when I finally got out of bed to go, it was 8, just a half hour past the red zone..which I believe is the start of feeling the way I do currently..you know, the no-selfworth feeling..yeah.

mindy got up and went to work..it wasn't til 3 I pulled myself out, and with the thought I wouldn't see her, but as I was getting ready she waltzed in, tried to make conversation with me..but I told her I wasn't in the mood..I continued to get ready and she gave me a hug goodbye..was too good/running late to give me a hug this morning, but now...whatever..fuck that..it just pisses me off...don't try to be there for your "friends" when they've finally given up on you...

I continued home, and I actually accomplished a lot in the little time I was out and about...I called some places about getting my tire for stupid Lucille..and I actually found a place that had a used tire that only cost me $25..as opposed to the $200 I would have had to spent on a new tire that would have thrown off my steering even more...I tried to reschedule with my appointment, but that didn't happen - I went to the post office, only to come to find I had to go to the post office on the other side of town for some reason - went to Pier 1 to get my price adjustment - stopped in at the furniture store to see they had sold my dining set - and to make matters best, the speakers that were sent to me, won't work...so all in all, the the means were better the end result..I was happier with the fact I did all this, than the fact that it all turned out so crappily...

at home I sulked, dave called me and we spoke briefly..he was making sure I was still alive from Monday night..and from that point on I continued with this weird, worse than floating through life feeling..I couldn't keep an actual thought in my head, I had a really bad indecisive ADD going on, my head hurt and I didn't feel as if I were really here, and my neck is in soo much pain..I just want to sleep without the hastle of waking up.













"Oh, I see you got a $15 ticket for driving drunk last night I found on the windshield of my car..."

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