Sunday, December 11, 2011


No Ashlee..
just Love..

This is a Loooong and Over Due Blog

How do I even begin such a blog, there's so much I want to say, so many things to cover, Love itself is such an extensive topic, how to go about properly delivering everything..I will do my best, as always.

I believe in Love. I believe in Love like I believe in God. I feel as if that statement right there is enough to start pumping the brakes, I just hit two very loaded topics in less than 10 words, awesome. When I say I believe in Love, I'm talking about True Love. I believe in True Love. I am, and will forever be, a hopeless romantic. One of my top three favorite movies of all time is Love Actually - it's actually one of the very few movies I have seen in the theaters on more than one sitting......this is gonna get heavy...

I have ranted and raved about Love in this blog before, and I'm sure if you've ever had a conversation with me it's come up as well. Sure, yes Love is everywhere, and people believe in Love..however, I am talking about True Love here, the stuff movies are made of, and that's where we differ.

I grew up watching TV, movies, plays, etc. And it was those stories I heard while so very young that made me believe in Love, what made me a hopeless romantic. I saw how happy people were, I saw the magical endings and I wanted that for myself. I have always wanted to be someone's Knight in Shining Armor, all my life I have been holding a shoe and chasing after my Cinderella - and sure those are just fairytales you may say, but why can that not be for me?

I want True Love to exist. In every relationship I have with someone I'm always seeking to see their version of Love. I always enter every relationship with a Love like I won't get hurt. I do not hold back or compromise my Love for I don't feel that's something anybody should do. All too often we being hurt from the last heartbreak enter, or maybe not even enter at all, into the next relationship with a cautious step, glaring eye, raised arm ready to strike, defensive stance, and a reserved heart. Everybody deserves love unadulterated.

And that's why I try to not let other factors or forces influence the love of others. For an example we will need to rewind a little over three years ago. I was living in Indy and had been dating a girl for a little over a year at that point. I was trying to get my life together and made another attempt at moving to Michigan to return to school at UofM. The girlfriend was supportive of that decision and even accompanied me on a trip to Michigan when I was solidifying my job transfer and re-enlistment in school.

Shortly after that trip the girl and I had some sort of a disagreement, or quarrel, or falling out..whatever the case. During the break we made attempts to patch things up, rectify, whatever. One thing that upsets me was that one of the girl's arguments for us to not get back together, or continue dating was that I was going to be in Michigan very shortly and that it wouldn't work out. However, it was also during the break that I found out my transfer didn't go through. I did not inform her of this news, not until many months later, but I felt that it was not imperative information for Love to exist. Whether I'm here or there shouldn't have an impact on whether or not she wants to be with me. I could have easily told her I in fact was staying and we could "totally be together", but then I would have been making excuses to be with her just as she was making excuses to not.

True devotion will always lead to action, True Love. I won't tell people what they want to hear. I won't tell people what they need to hear. I won't lie to someone. I won't fake something..all in the name of Love...I want Love to show through.

Following up on that story, what's even more notable is that I believe in the dreaded, LDR, or Long Distance Relationships. Whether it's just starting out or in the middle of a relationship, the LDR is crucial to the existence of True Love. I feel more often than not that people put so much improper weight on the physicality in a relationship. People date, become physical, and then the next thing you know they are trying to ask what the others middle name is. They try to seek the justification for that physicality and end up playing "catch up" - thereby learning more about the other, showing an interest even though the interest has been a direct result of the premature physicality.

Now I am not saying that the physical aspect to a relationship isn't important, noo noo - heck, I'm actually a proponent for sex before marriage (to a certain degree). Yes, I believe being physically compatible is important in a good relationship. People kiss differently, some may fit into that little spot tucked into your arms differently, some have weird shaped vaginas...just like you're not going to get along with everyone in this world in a non-physical realm, the same goes for the physical too. And just because you and that other person hit it off, like the same music and movies, believe in the same thing, have whatever else in common, doesn't mean physically it's going to work either..

In a relationship where the LDR is at the beginning, the couple can focus on each other. They can spend their nights learning about the other person, taking in an actual genuine interest into the other person. In this step, if those in this LDR are willing to make commitments to each other, they already have a stronger relationship than most. Foundation is key to any thing, especially relationships. You can't expect to build a solid ground all the while having the vision of the relationship clouded by the physical sense. Yeah I like being sexual, but you can have sexy time with virtually anyone..what I crave is intimacy. With this LDR you can build an intimacy before you get into that physical state.

Should the LDR come in the middle of a relationship it will prove to be another test of faith. As hard as it is to have the significant other removed, there are ways to still keep in touch. Heck, I was in boot camp for three months..I rarely got to write letters, and in all reality, my girlfriend and I never communicated while I was gone, but it worked. As long as you can put your trust and faith into someone you are dating, True Love will see the LDR through. To have the physical presence of your other suddenly removed is a tough blow, and could be easily replaced, but that's not wouldn't do that if it were True Love..I believe in True Love.

If you Love someone that's all that matters, or it should be. People can find love in all sorts of others. We've all heard opposites attract. I once went on a date with a girl who on paper was the anti-thesis of The Jangus, but when we hung out we actually got along very well, and there was a chemistry. That's the thing people always over look, on paper it looks good, or bad, or not right, or whatever..on paper this or that...well Love isn't a set of standards, it isn't the same for everyone, it's completely different for doesn't need to make sense to others..most of the time it doesn't make sense to's's's crazy..Love breaks the molds, the boundaries, does the impossible..

The ideas of True Love have been instilled in me for a very long, and though my heart has been broken along the way, what has remained is the undying passion that there is True Love. Yes, I will admit and say I have turned my back against Love time and again. I have spoke ill-will, claiming it to be a pipe-dream, not real, and so forth. I may have cursed it, hated it, ran its name through the mud, I may have said inexplicable things in regards to its existence...but, when push comes to shove, ultimately, my faith remains, I still, and will always, Believe. My heart knows what is right, my heart knows what is true, and it will always lead me back where I need to be, where I belong. In my heart I believe in God just like I believe in Love, for afterall, God is Love.

Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Rejoice in the truth.

"I'm talkin' bout love Love is an energy, love is a mystery Love is meant to be true Love is a part of me, love is the heart of me Love is the best thing we do"

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